Hey, I love your blog. Whenever you get the time to post and you’re stumped for topics can I request a post on life after college? How you’ve found the transition, any surprises - pleasant or not, favourite college experiences and what kind of art you’re making now.
Sadly, the only kind of art I’m making right now is sketches - but I hope to make more soon! I did write a vaguely post-college entry here, but I’d be happy to expand on the topic more! (This post isn’t available from the homepage of my blog since it’s fairly personal)
Thank you so much for the message/suggestion - it always means a lot to get encouragement from you guys! I actually have a post lined up for this week, I just need to post it. It’s been sitting in my drafts for two months!
Hi Catherine! I'm currently a 2nd year college student. I'm feeling really lonely - I've been here for 2 years and I have only made 2 or 3 close friends, but a huge network of acquaintances. Do you have any advice on how to make friends in college?
I’m probably the worst person to ask about this because I’m a HUGE introvert by nature, and I’ve never gotten over my fear of going to parties and meeting new people. But here’s what I’d suggest:
- You MUST learn to step out of your comfort zone. It’s ok to go to parties where you only vaguely know one or two people – chances are someone will talk to you. If they don’t, you can always leave. I can’t tell you how many awkward and horrible parties I’ve been to where I felt absolutely invisible, but it’s ok, because there are also the times that I did stick my neck out and met lots of wonderful people who are really good friends of mine.
- On this note, alcohol seriously helps. Yes, I’m condoning drinking (as long as it’s done safely, and of course if you don’t have any personal problems with it). MOST people feel awkward, nervous, and shy around people they don’t know, and loosening up a little bit with a drink can seriously help you (and everyone else) lower their barriers. You’ll also have good (and awful) stories to share years later. Most people that I know (myself included) met their closest friends by going out to parties.
- School clubs are another great way to make solid friendships because you already share something in common with the people there. Also, I highly recommend inviting people out after club meetings.
- Don’t wait for people to ask you to hang out. This took me FOREVER to figure out, because I thought that if people weren’t contacting me to hang out, they didn’t want to hang out with me; I didn’t want to be annoying, persistent, etcetera. But the old cliché that friendship is a two-way street is true; you have to initiate sometimes. If the person says no the first time, they might just be busy. Don’t be discouraged, and try again in a few weeks. Just check in with them occasionally. They might be sitting around waiting for the phone to ring, too!
- Ask people about themselves and LISTEN. I’ve seen so many pretty, talented, interesting, and intelligent people go through college without making ANY real friends because all they could talk about was themselves. Just asking other people where they’re from, what television shows they watch, where they’re traveling over summer vacation, what classes they’re taking, etcetera can give you guys common ground you never expected, and it also shows that you’re genuinely interested. Also remember those details – it can be a conversation-starter for the next time you see them (e.g., how was your trip to _____?)
I’m not an expert on this at all, but hopefully this helps somewhat. It’s different for every person and situation, and honestly I think socializing and making friends (beyond acquaintances) is a skill that you have to practice and learn, just like anything else. And maybe some readers have other suggestions, too?
I read your headline expecting some ignorant post about how cyclists are terrible, blah blah blah, but - I was pleasantly surprised! I want to share this with your followers: I almost always claim the right lane as my own, riding in the farthest left portion of it - and I think you should too. It increases your visibility, differentiating you from signs, trees, and trash cans, and it also forces motorists to wait until it is safe to pass, instead of encouraging them to squeeze by!
Ever tried fleur de mal's lingerie?
I haven’t. I love their designs but I’ve never seen it stocked anywhere below a 32b.
When are you going to France ? I really like your blog btw
Thank you! End of June. My sister and my birthday (june 21) is the day of the fête de la musique, so it’s always been our dream to go on our birthday.
hi i'd like to ask your personal opinion on what you would do in this situation. i ordered the jet bra from agent provocateur; i love it and the fit is great except for the two upside down v-straps that meet in the center-- they kind of bulge out and i have done everything to adjust the bra but alas, i have failed. i called AP and they no longer do alterations, so i'm not sure if i should just call it quits and return the bra or try to find another place that could do the alterations?
I try to return things if I’m not 100% happy with it (unless I need it for a special occasion). You could put the money you’ve spent on the Jet towards a bra that you love. I think the AP Jet bra is gorgeous, but I always have problems with cut-out or strappy style bras - the straps always bulge or hang on me, and they almost never fit the way they do on the models (but isn’t that true for most things?). If it doesn’t fit you the way you want, I’d return it, unless you really really love it and think you could get over the issue with the center straps.
I've recently started getting into lingerie. I like the fact that it's pretty low pressure since only my boyfriend sees it and that it exists for the sole purpose of making me feel good. I love brands like AP and La Perla, of course, but I have a relatively limited budget and can't afford those things right now. Do you have any recommendations for mid-range brands? I live in Europe now (but will be moving back to the states in a few months), so bonus points for anything available there.
A lot of AP bras go on sale for $20-60 - they have a sale at least twice a year, so I highly recommend watching out for those! I always try to post them on here when they happen - it’s the best time to stock up.
ASOS also has a GREAT selection of lingerie all at varying prices - some are still somewhat pricey, but they have a ton of bras for less than AP or La Perla. I also like Aerie, though in terms of bras, I’ve only tried their unlined bras and bralettes. I *love* their panties. (I’m not sure if they ship to Europe, though!) Anthropologie also has an incredible selection of lingerie sometimes, though their size range is kind of small.
Some other online stores I like (that carry various price points) are Journelle and Azalea’s NYC. They both have a varying range of prices, and if you join their mailing lists, they frequently send out 20% off coupons!
What’s your specific price range? And what kind of lingerie are you looking for? Lacy bralettes, t-shirt bras, or garter belts? If you give me more specific details, I can give you more brand recommendations! (I hope this list helps somewhat at least!)
i hope this isn't too strange a question to ask, but what is your bra size? i'm pretty petite but i loveee lingerie so much, i just feel like it wouldn't fit me as well as it does the models.
I’m a 32a/30b if I can find it, so I’m pretty petite as well in terms of bra size. To be perfectly frank, a very small percentage of people look the way models do in lingerie, mostly because a very small percentage of women have a modelesque body, and also because even models are photoshopped in lingerie. If you’ve opened a Victoria’s Secret catalogue lately, it’s almost hilarious how poorly executed the dodge-and-burn technique used on their cleavage is, and yet for some reason it still makes women feel bad about their bodies. Not to mention these women are often fitted into the wrong size bra with extra padding to beef up their cleavage.
I used to bra fit for Nordstrom, and I can say with certainty that no woman looked the way the models do in lingerie. And that’s okay! I think bones, curves, lumps (the non-cancerous ones of course), ripples, and whatever other “imperfections” make us beautiful, too! (And most women - skinny, curvy, etc have them.) I also think it’s important to note that lingerie ads don’t always accurately advertise how bras should fit.
If you love lingerie, don’t let the way it looks on models stop you from indulging in it! In fact, I’ve found lingerie incredibly liberating in this respect because no one else will see it, so no one else can measure how you look in it against how it looks on other people.
The photo you took of a girl holding books in lingerie seems really similar to Marie Zucker's photo of the same.. you inspired by her work? flickr[.]com/photos/thegirlwhotamedthetiger/5407419236/
i was seriously waiting for someone to draw this parallel. marie was actually inspired by my photo. if you check the date on this blog post made by audreyhepburncomplex (not my blog), it predates marie zucker’s photo by a year. marie actually messaged me on flickr (i still have the message) to see if she could post her photo that was inspired by mine. she didn’t post credit, which upset me a little bit at the time, but it doesn’t bother me now. i’ve always really enjoyed her photography and I still do.
my original photo in color doesn’t exist on flickr anymore because i preferred the black and white version. but yes, if there’s any question of which came first, check the blog post above for the timestamp. or you can just message marie, because she’s incredibly sweet and she’d tell you the same thing.
Let the haters hate! Or in this case the creepers creep. Do what you love man!
thank you, anon! i’m still not prepared to post the full set on my blog, but all of the support i’ve been getting really does mean a lot. thanks again (you and everyone else) for your messages~ <3
I think your last post is pretty amazing. If I reblog, does it make me a creeper?
thank you so much, and not at all! by creepers, I mean people who send me demeaning or sexual messages when I post lingerie. It’s sad, but it happens almost every time, which is part of the reason I hardly ever do lingerie shoots anymore…
that's absolutely gorgeous!
What was your last dream about?
I don’t dream very often; in fact, I can’t remember the last time I had a dream and remembered it the next morning.
Both would be wonderful! I've been looking at both day dresses and party dresses so, idk, just anything awesome :)
One dress I’ve been dying for is the For Love & Lemons Anna dress in black or in black velvet (it’s also available on a lot of shops in an emerald velvet). It shows just the right amount of skin, and would look great with an oversized hat, leopard fur coat, and boots. Can’t say enough about how cute this dress is!
I also love this Nasty Gal strapless dress. Super simple but classic and easy to dress up/down.
I’m also really into cami dresses right now. Here’s a cute one from ASOS, and Zara has a lot of cute ones too!
I’ll just number the rest of them off. Some are more casual than others: 1 2 3 4
Good luck on the hunt! :)
How large is your apartment?
Seriously dude, this is the last warning I’m giving you: Stop sending me messages. I’ve already filed a police report with a few of your IPs for ceaselessly messaging me weirdly personal questions, and I am/they are poised to take action as soon as tomorrow.
Do not send me another one ever.